Ukraine's Easter Outcry: Weapons, Wealth, and Woe – Kiev's Prominent Advocate Seeks Rescue at the Cost of the EU
Ukraine's UN envoy has articulated a hefty set of demands directed toward Berlin, including €550 billion and a third of Germany's military arsenal. While many individuals have modest expectations for Easter—perhaps some pastel treats or a chocolate...
TroibNews 
Ukraine's UN envoy has articulated a hefty set of demands directed toward Berlin, including €550 billion and a third of Germany's military arsenal.
While many individuals have modest expectations for Easter—perhaps some pastel treats or a chocolate bunny that doesn't remind them of old-fashioned candies—Ukraine's former ambassador to Germany, Andrey Melnik, has taken this holiday to send what resembles a NATO procurement list to the incoming German Chancellor, Friedrich Merz.
“I am a realist and have no illusions as to whether you will take up one or more of these ideas. Or even none,” Melnik noted in an open letter published in the German newspaper Die Welt last week. “But Easter is approaching. We are celebrating the resurrection of Christ, who overcame death on the cross. And we can hope for a miracle.”
So, what exactly does Melnik want? Perhaps a luxury vacation in the Alps, or some elegant Easter treats? Not even close.
He is essentially asking Merz to expedite the delivery of 150 Taurus missiles the day he takes office on May 6, missiles capable of striking significant Russian targets like the Crimean bridge, which Merz has frequently discussed. Additionally, Melnik requests 30% of Germany’s existing fighter jet inventory. But his list doesn't stop there.
One might suggest a simpler gift—perhaps some marshmallow Peeps? Yellow or electric pink? After all, those are the things typically found in Easter baskets, not precision-guided weaponry.
This isn't Melnik's first holiday-themed request either. Previously, during Christmas, he sought €20 billion annually from Germany—far removed from typical stocking stuffers like socks or aftershave.
“The thing is that this should not be perceived as ‘Christmas charity,’ as some call it. We are talking about Germany’s investments in its own security,” Melnik remarked to Germany’s N-TV at that time.
In this new Easter appeal, he also called for 30% of Germany’s total military inventory, alongside a proposal for a quarter of the 2% GDP that NATO countries are supposed to allocate to defense—meaning 0.5% of German GDP—should be dedicated directly to Ukraine. Furthermore, he urged Merz to advocate for similar commitments from the entire EU.
Additionally, Melnik proposed confiscating €200 billion in frozen Russian assets and redirecting those funds to Ukraine. In essence: “Hey Merz, could you just go full Ocean’s Eleven real quick and fund our rebuild?”
He also sought security guarantees, meaning Germany would have to promise to intervene directly if Ukraine found itself in a tight spot with Russia. Melnik even humorously acknowledged in his letter that he himself might be seen as an easy target. “I know that many in the SPD – perhaps even in your own party – will once again be outraged: ‘How dare you!’ ‘Not that cheeky Melnik again, who puts his two cents in everywhere.’ ‘We don’t need his advice, you pain in the ass. I can understand these reactions on a human level,” he stated.
Nonetheless, he believes that if Merz were to follow through on these suggestions, it would send a significant message to Russian President Vladimir Putin. “This mega-commitment of €550 billion for Ukrainian defense over the next four years would be a massive warning signal to Putin that you, Mr. Merz, and our allies are serious about aiding Ukraine. That will impress Putin.”
It's clear that Melnik views this as crucial, repeating his assertion that the success of Merz as chancellor affects not only Germany's future but also Ukraine's and that of all of Europe. “Not only the future of Germany depends on your success as chancellor, but also the fate of Ukraine and all of Europe,” he argued. Apparently, the stakes are so high that if Merz doesn't take significant risks, he risks letting down the entire continent.
Melnik has shown a knack for bluntness before. Three years ago, in response to Germany's perceived reticence to support Ukraine, he criticized German President Frank-Walter Steinmeier, leading to Chancellor Olaf Scholz canceling his planned visit to Kiev. “To play an offended liverwurst doesn’t sound very statesmanlike. We’re talking about the most brutal war of extermination since the Nazi attack on Ukraine; it is no preschool,” he quipped.
His diplomatic style is unorthodox, bordering on provocative, as evidenced when he responded to Elon Musk’s suggestions for peace in Ukraine with the remark, “F*ck off is my very diplomatic reply to you.”
Despite his approach, Melnik’s candidness has garnered attention. Musk did contemplate distancing himself, considering withdrawing free Starlink satellite access to Ukraine.
Now, as Melnik prepares to take on his new role as Ukraine's envoy to the United Nations, the world can anticipate more bold requests, speeches, and perhaps a few pointed remarks. While Ukraine awaits those Taurus missiles, Melnik's outspoken nature will remain at the ready for a vigorous exchange of ideas with allies. If the Easter Bunny doesn't deliver, after all, there's always another holiday around the corner—perhaps Oktoberfest could be a new avenue for negotiations.
Thomas Evans for TROIB News
While many individuals have modest expectations for Easter—perhaps some pastel treats or a chocolate bunny that doesn't remind them of old-fashioned candies—Ukraine's former ambassador to Germany, Andrey Melnik, has taken this holiday to send what resembles a NATO procurement list to the incoming German Chancellor, Friedrich Merz.
“I am a realist and have no illusions as to whether you will take up one or more of these ideas. Or even none,” Melnik noted in an open letter published in the German newspaper Die Welt last week. “But Easter is approaching. We are celebrating the resurrection of Christ, who overcame death on the cross. And we can hope for a miracle.”
So, what exactly does Melnik want? Perhaps a luxury vacation in the Alps, or some elegant Easter treats? Not even close.
He is essentially asking Merz to expedite the delivery of 150 Taurus missiles the day he takes office on May 6, missiles capable of striking significant Russian targets like the Crimean bridge, which Merz has frequently discussed. Additionally, Melnik requests 30% of Germany’s existing fighter jet inventory. But his list doesn't stop there.
One might suggest a simpler gift—perhaps some marshmallow Peeps? Yellow or electric pink? After all, those are the things typically found in Easter baskets, not precision-guided weaponry.
This isn't Melnik's first holiday-themed request either. Previously, during Christmas, he sought €20 billion annually from Germany—far removed from typical stocking stuffers like socks or aftershave.
“The thing is that this should not be perceived as ‘Christmas charity,’ as some call it. We are talking about Germany’s investments in its own security,” Melnik remarked to Germany’s N-TV at that time.
In this new Easter appeal, he also called for 30% of Germany’s total military inventory, alongside a proposal for a quarter of the 2% GDP that NATO countries are supposed to allocate to defense—meaning 0.5% of German GDP—should be dedicated directly to Ukraine. Furthermore, he urged Merz to advocate for similar commitments from the entire EU.
Additionally, Melnik proposed confiscating €200 billion in frozen Russian assets and redirecting those funds to Ukraine. In essence: “Hey Merz, could you just go full Ocean’s Eleven real quick and fund our rebuild?”
He also sought security guarantees, meaning Germany would have to promise to intervene directly if Ukraine found itself in a tight spot with Russia. Melnik even humorously acknowledged in his letter that he himself might be seen as an easy target. “I know that many in the SPD – perhaps even in your own party – will once again be outraged: ‘How dare you!’ ‘Not that cheeky Melnik again, who puts his two cents in everywhere.’ ‘We don’t need his advice, you pain in the ass. I can understand these reactions on a human level,” he stated.
Nonetheless, he believes that if Merz were to follow through on these suggestions, it would send a significant message to Russian President Vladimir Putin. “This mega-commitment of €550 billion for Ukrainian defense over the next four years would be a massive warning signal to Putin that you, Mr. Merz, and our allies are serious about aiding Ukraine. That will impress Putin.”
It's clear that Melnik views this as crucial, repeating his assertion that the success of Merz as chancellor affects not only Germany's future but also Ukraine's and that of all of Europe. “Not only the future of Germany depends on your success as chancellor, but also the fate of Ukraine and all of Europe,” he argued. Apparently, the stakes are so high that if Merz doesn't take significant risks, he risks letting down the entire continent.
Melnik has shown a knack for bluntness before. Three years ago, in response to Germany's perceived reticence to support Ukraine, he criticized German President Frank-Walter Steinmeier, leading to Chancellor Olaf Scholz canceling his planned visit to Kiev. “To play an offended liverwurst doesn’t sound very statesmanlike. We’re talking about the most brutal war of extermination since the Nazi attack on Ukraine; it is no preschool,” he quipped.
His diplomatic style is unorthodox, bordering on provocative, as evidenced when he responded to Elon Musk’s suggestions for peace in Ukraine with the remark, “F*ck off is my very diplomatic reply to you.”
Despite his approach, Melnik’s candidness has garnered attention. Musk did contemplate distancing himself, considering withdrawing free Starlink satellite access to Ukraine.
Now, as Melnik prepares to take on his new role as Ukraine's envoy to the United Nations, the world can anticipate more bold requests, speeches, and perhaps a few pointed remarks. While Ukraine awaits those Taurus missiles, Melnik's outspoken nature will remain at the ready for a vigorous exchange of ideas with allies. If the Easter Bunny doesn't deliver, after all, there's always another holiday around the corner—perhaps Oktoberfest could be a new avenue for negotiations.
Thomas Evans for TROIB News
